so i finally got diagnosed for the first time after so many fucking years
I got diagnosed with ptsd & gad ( not shocking ) the surprising part was ocd
but I was thinking back to my rants and vents I've put on this vlog & my live journal and that shit lowkey makes sense lmao
lowkey been struggling with harm ocd and pure o since I was younger 💀 I also got a medication prescribed (fluoxetine) but I don't think I'll take it because the symptoms don't seem worth it to me, I think I just need therapy to regulate, also feel like I'd kill myself if I started gaining weight which sounds terrible but I fixate on my body a lot so I don't know
anyway, on the way back, my mom decided to be a dick about me being raped by my older sister for some reason & asked in an argument how I was raped in the first place and basically looked mortified when I told her
😐 ...
mind you, we're barely a few days away from me running away and going missing from home after my mom told me she didn't care to see me in the future, even if it was my wedding or seeing my future kids just because I'm queer
Awesome track record mom. I need to get a fucking job but no one will hire meee, mind you, I have some experience & literally am good for a flexible schedule and no dyed hair or piercings bruh
been real tired but it could be worse